Got SLP problems?  Most of us do.

Too much paperwork, high caseloads, not balancing home life- not to mention “you time,” no respect, meetings, make-up sessions, personality conflicts, BURNOUT. (shout your favorite expletive here!!!)  SLP burnout usually looks fine on the outside.  You’re still getting dressed in the morning, going to work, eating meals… but it’s all just so frickin hard sometimes.  You fantasize about leaving it all behind because you’re exhausted.  Mentally drained.

Dear SLP’s, Let’s make the case for your mental health.

Think about it.  You rarely hear the term “mental” unless it’s full-on “mental illness” or “mental problems.” That person is mental –having a negative connotation.

I’d like to point out.  We are all mental (and that’s a good thing).  The word “mental” is defined as “relating to the mind.”  We’re human beings.  We have minds.  We all have a brain that thinks.  You don’t overhear someone commenting, “Wow, she has super mental health.”   We assume that if we are not mentally ill, we must be mentally healthy. Right?  (WRONG) The mediocre, getting by, functioning, standard, lack of mental illness; THIS is considered mental health?!

You deserve more.

I’d like to propose a standard of “outstanding mental health.” 

We must think of what it means to be mentally healthy.

If you’re a human being, you might think that mental health looks like sunshine an rainbows all of the time. Hello! Have you looked at your friend’s FB profiles?  Most other people are happy all the time -aren’t they?  NO, We are human. There are happy times. There are painful times.  Part of mental health is about developing the skill of managing the crappy stuff.  Our mind creates our thoughts, feelings, reactions, interpretations of the world.  We can use our mind as a tool to create greater awareness, well being, joy.  Like I did, you can learn to use your  mind to better deal with painful emotions, give clarity and train it to be more solution-focused.

Most people don’t though.  It’s hard.  They are victims.  The world happens to them.  They feel out of control.  They don’t understand that their brain is a tool that can be used to interact with your life circumstances in a purposeful way.  There are skills that you develop in order to improve your mental health. Not just to a level of “functional.”  I’m talking about outstanding mental health.  It feels better, why aren’t we doing it?

Why do we put mental health last on the priority list when it’s THE MOST important investment you can make.

Most people don’t consider proactively investing time, effort and money into our mental well-being.

why?

The SHOULD:  I shouldn’t miss this meeting.  I shouldn’t be so stressed.  I should (magically) be better.

The I HAVE to:  I can’t take time for myself, I HAVE to plan new activities.

The NOT ENOUGH:  I don’t have enough time for mental health.  It’s too hard.  I can’t afford it, I have responsibilities.

We buy homes. Sit in them, and feel anxious.  We make a car payment, then dread driving to work.  Or we’re too exhausted to go anywhere.   We buy clothes we don’t need then feel regret.   We spend hours frantically overworking to the point of burnout.    Personally, I’d rather feel better and have a tiny apartment.  I’d rather spend time and learn skills that empower me.  I’d rather spend money on learning tools to recover from burnout.  It’s a no brainer (pun-intented).  Yet, So many SLP’s are stressed, burned out, confused and stuck.

To our defense

Nobody teaches us directly about managing our mind to create well-being and handle negative emotion.  (That’s a thing???)  Not mentioning the possibility of develping outstanding mental health.  Our parents don’t teach us this.  We don’t learn it in school or college.  Doctors don’t ask how we are managing our mind and mental health. Their response is “Oh you feel depressed, here’s a pill for that.”  I am not at all against medications that help people.  Medications can do amazing things.   It’s just, there is no teaching or treatment for the cause of the symptoms.  Well, there’s therapy. Although some therapists are awesome and there are different approaches.   I was in therapy on and off for years and never learned actionable skills to intrinsically manage my mental health.

Confession:

My job was stressful.  I used to raid the prize box for treats daily.  Hit the fridge as soon as I got home.  Then I gained weight. Not too much but enough that I had to get my dress pants off as soon as I got home. (sorry TMI) I beat up on myself for that. I would exercise (as punishment for overeating).  Then I’d eat some more, have a glass of wine. Stay up writing reports.  Pinterest and Facebook until I was so exhausted I couldn’t hold the phone up. ( okay sometimes I still do that)  I’d wake up exhausted again.  I was a victim of my job, people, things that happened around me.  All because I had no idea how to handle stress, overwhelm, exhaustion, restlessness, lack of confidence.

I felt powerless.  Like I was being swept away.

Then I’d feel even worse because I was telling myself, “You shouldn’t be feeling this way.”  Add guilt, shame, embarrassment to the list.   I was feeling bad- so I’d turn around and ridicule myself for feeling bad. Double, triple bummer.  WOW!! good times.  I still had no awareness of the power I had.  This might seem extreme.  Most people are doing this on some level.  I was getting by, completely functional.  I was paying my bills, going to work, meeting friends, even going to the gym.

Borderline mediocre to blah mental health, but not mentally ill- so that’s okay

 

Trust me, there’s more.  You must claim it.  

Invest in yourself.

I offer a free 20 minute coaching session to help you through your individual situation.

 

Stay tuned.  Next week I’m going to be writing about the ten indicators for needing an “outstanding mental health”  Response to Intervention plan (RtI) of sorts.