Barely getting through week to week? Just making it to the next break? Feel like you’re stuck in a rut? Here are 3 main reasons we get bogged down by our day to day. You 
can’t seem to make any real progress towards what you REALLY want in life. Oh yeah, running like this for too long will lead you straight to burnout. Once you hit burnout you are not at your full capacity to serve yourself in a way that is healthy, but how can you recover?
2018 needs to be different.
Let’s look at the top habits that keep us stuck.
①Lack of purposeful planning and prioritizing.
You get so busy being busy. Stuck on a hamster wheel. WAIT, I know what you’re thinking, Did she just tell me I don’t plan enough? How the hell can I plan when I can’t even get through my day??? I know. I totally get- it’s annoying for me to bring up planning. It takes an investment of time to open up and create time. If we don’t take time to re-assess where we are and where we want to go? -We’ll keep creating the same results over and over and over. Is this you? I’m guilty too at times. Make some time for yourself to sit down with a journal. Take a mental health day- Do it! Your mental health is the most important resource you have. Here’s some guiding questions.
Decide where you want to shift your focus, time and effort.
During different phases of your life your focus will shift. Right now, I am in a stage where my mental health and my family are most important to me. That doesn’t mean I let everything else go. I still work my full-time, school-based position. I still run my coaching business. I still write articles. I still take care of my physical health. I purposefully design and mold my life so that I can put mental health and family first. I know exactly what’s important everyday. You do not have to drop everything else in order to shift your priorities.
Where is your focus now? Do you want to focus on career, physical health, mental health, home life, a home remodel???… Last summer my focus was on creating my website and content for my life coaching practice. The point is. Once per quarter, purposefully decide where you want your focus to be. It may be the same each quarter. No judging here, let yourself want what you want. Stephen Covey wrote about urgent vs important tasks. Many of us are constantly reacting to “urgent” tasks, with no regard to what is actually important to us.
- Small example, I clearly set my focus- mental health and family. Email at work is not a good use of my time. My priorities are clear. Therefore, I spend minimal time crafting emails. ① Check once per day ② Respond concisely, only to what is necessary. Spending extra time on this is non-negotiable. Period.
Decide what is not working, determine which areas need to change and why?
Use a time journal to track where your precious time and energy actually go. For one day, take notes on what you have done every 15 minutes. Good ol’ fashion pen and paper work best for me. It will be obnoxious to record, but it’s only for one day and its eye-opening to look at where your time is actually going. Note that you are deciding already, but it may be by default without truly considering what is important to you. Don’t live your life on default mode.
Make a plan.
What will you need to DO differently? Why? How will you need to shift time and effort to serve you? How will you change your focus? It can be done, I promise. I can help you sort all of this out. Get a free mini session.
② Fears
Dang those fears. When we purposefully decide on shifting our priorities and make a plan to honor those priorities, it requires us to change what we do (and think) on a daily basis. It requires us to manage our mind. As soon as your brain even senses change, it’s going to panic and resist. It’s going to tell you it’s impossible. The smallest change, like-only checking email once per day and only responding concisely when needed; your brain thinks that change is literally dangerous. So it flips out and tells you to stay stuck. Do things the way you’ve always done them-It’ll be “safer” -except you never get to the priorities that you set for yourself. This is your life, create it the way you want it.
The key here is- knowing ahead of time. When you decide to make positive change for yourself, you will need to do things differently. YOUR BRAIN WILL FREAK OUT. It will tell you all the reasons this is a terrible idea… -That’s okay LET IT. Watch your brain freak out and DO IT ANYWAY. After a while it will calm (the f) down and you will be even closer to what you truly want. I can help you get untangled here.
③ Lack of follow through
Don’t feel bad, we all do it. I can teach you a simple trick to get past it. It’s logical that shifting priorities and focus will definitely take effort. I think most of us don’t anticipate the incessant fits your brain will throw in order to stay the same. Even when you are miserable-your brain thinks it’s safer to stay miserable than change. YOur brain just wants to take the easiest route. even if it feels its making you feel awful. Or it will tell you to quit everything and check out of your life (scroll on your phone, binge watch, eat, drink…).
You will need to make an investment in yourself here.
You will need to anticipate ahead of time that you will not ” feel like” doing things differently, in the moment. It’s a lot to kindly ask of yourself when you are already feeling drained.
- For example, If you have decided that you want to exercise before (or after) work everyday because you know it’s good for you, it will give you more energy, it will improve your mental health too. When that moment comes, you will not feel like putting your sneakers on and doing it. . MAKE A PLAN FOR THOSE MOMENTS ahead of time. Do everything you can to help yourself over that small hump of not feeling like it in the moment. Gather everything you need. write down the reasons you want to do this for yourself, and just do it knowing it will get easier the more you practice getting over that hump. We’ve all been there, once you get started, you will continue to build momentum for yourself.
Remember that whatever you are practicing is what you (and your brain) are getting really good at. If you’re getting a lot of practice at over-working at the expense of yourself -THAT is what you are getting good at (hello burnout) and you will create a pattern in your brain for that. If you practice worrying about what others think you will get good at that.
We might as well practice thought patterns and actions that actually create positive results aligned with our priorities.
Do you need help sorting all of this out. I can help you with that-Get a free clarity call
